"Every stumble, every uncoordinated movement had me cringing—not because of him, but because I felt the eyes of other parents, imagined their judgment, as if his movements were somehow reflecting on me." This is so honest and true as a parent. Loved the perspective you offer here, and the internal tension you share with us. Really made me reflect, thanks for sharing!
Great essay. Nothing wrong with a trail run with Natty Bumppo. Love the awareness of this. So hard (and ironic) to know if, as a parent, the magnitude of improvement vs how we were raised is enough for our own children. Imo, it’s one of the most challenging things to know as a parent, how much is enough. This piece captured that very well. It is an ongoing grapple. Keep bringing the goods 👊
Thanks, Matt!! yeah, I feel you on the challenge and glad it resonates, I figure we all navigate some form of this tension in our parenting! appreciate you diving in and sharing impact!
Jason love this essay! We talk a lot as parents about helping our kids become resilient, but in truth this is hard work. Letting our kids learn through tough experiences while holding space and working through our own patterns is not easy. I’m on this path as a parent too, and I’m writing an essay on the painful discovery of a greater love through this process. It really has a lot to do with our own freedom in the end.
Love this, Emily!! totally, even in the last few days I keep recognizing more and more ways I can't just let my son be in his process and these sneaky little judgments that are concealed as being "true" - luckily my wife calls my ass out a lot! haha .... please share what you write - would love to hear about the discovery of a GREATER love!!!
The father-son dynamic is so complex and challenging at times. You do a great job conveying the experience from both perspectives. What a beautiful lesson in learning to let go while also being a champion for your son! Thank you, Jason!
So complex - I know you know that deeply having kids on the other side of childhood now!! Thanks, Darren! just doing our best to create more champions in the world!
hell of a job with this one Jason. incredibly relatable. makes me wonder how often my dad, who we all considered the ultimate badass, held back for similar reasons to those you cite here. at the time it didn't feel like he held back that much, always pushing, but in hindsight, i know he held back a lot for my benefit. as my own 2 year old son starts to develop, i am starting to wrestle with some of these things as well. we want them to be strong. we cringe a little when we see signals that they're not immediately excelling. and we have to examine why that is, as you're doing. we may never find the perfect balance, but i think the key is to never stop trying. well done.
Thank you!! yeah it's wild, even a few days later reflecting on this essay I feel like I continue to lean into my own truth on the matter, and especially for our boys, in connecting with dad and especially in the younger years, I don't know 7 and below maybe longer who knows - I think our job is to cultivate play (that's the only way oxytocin is released in kids from male parental figure). So maybe we can just put down all these micro adversities and challenges and consider life is already wild and hard enough for a little developing human in the world and really focus on connection. my thoughts that are unfolding real time! thanks for the engagement - I appreciate the thoughtfulness and intention that you show up with as a father!
This hit home. Reminds me of the time I took my niece to her first ballet class, only for her to spend the entire lesson pretending to be a velociraptor. Parenting (or, in my case, uncle-ing) seems to have a way of unearthing our own layers, doesn't it?
"Every stumble, every uncoordinated movement had me cringing—not because of him, but because I felt the eyes of other parents, imagined their judgment, as if his movements were somehow reflecting on me." This is so honest and true as a parent. Loved the perspective you offer here, and the internal tension you share with us. Really made me reflect, thanks for sharing!
thanks Rachel :) and happy reflecting!
Great essay. Nothing wrong with a trail run with Natty Bumppo. Love the awareness of this. So hard (and ironic) to know if, as a parent, the magnitude of improvement vs how we were raised is enough for our own children. Imo, it’s one of the most challenging things to know as a parent, how much is enough. This piece captured that very well. It is an ongoing grapple. Keep bringing the goods 👊
Thanks, Matt!! yeah, I feel you on the challenge and glad it resonates, I figure we all navigate some form of this tension in our parenting! appreciate you diving in and sharing impact!
Jason love this essay! We talk a lot as parents about helping our kids become resilient, but in truth this is hard work. Letting our kids learn through tough experiences while holding space and working through our own patterns is not easy. I’m on this path as a parent too, and I’m writing an essay on the painful discovery of a greater love through this process. It really has a lot to do with our own freedom in the end.
Love this, Emily!! totally, even in the last few days I keep recognizing more and more ways I can't just let my son be in his process and these sneaky little judgments that are concealed as being "true" - luckily my wife calls my ass out a lot! haha .... please share what you write - would love to hear about the discovery of a GREATER love!!!
The father-son dynamic is so complex and challenging at times. You do a great job conveying the experience from both perspectives. What a beautiful lesson in learning to let go while also being a champion for your son! Thank you, Jason!
So complex - I know you know that deeply having kids on the other side of childhood now!! Thanks, Darren! just doing our best to create more champions in the world!
It’s a formidable challenge but also the most rewarding! Bless you, Jason! ❤️🔥🙏🏼
hell of a job with this one Jason. incredibly relatable. makes me wonder how often my dad, who we all considered the ultimate badass, held back for similar reasons to those you cite here. at the time it didn't feel like he held back that much, always pushing, but in hindsight, i know he held back a lot for my benefit. as my own 2 year old son starts to develop, i am starting to wrestle with some of these things as well. we want them to be strong. we cringe a little when we see signals that they're not immediately excelling. and we have to examine why that is, as you're doing. we may never find the perfect balance, but i think the key is to never stop trying. well done.
Thank you!! yeah it's wild, even a few days later reflecting on this essay I feel like I continue to lean into my own truth on the matter, and especially for our boys, in connecting with dad and especially in the younger years, I don't know 7 and below maybe longer who knows - I think our job is to cultivate play (that's the only way oxytocin is released in kids from male parental figure). So maybe we can just put down all these micro adversities and challenges and consider life is already wild and hard enough for a little developing human in the world and really focus on connection. my thoughts that are unfolding real time! thanks for the engagement - I appreciate the thoughtfulness and intention that you show up with as a father!
This hit home. Reminds me of the time I took my niece to her first ballet class, only for her to spend the entire lesson pretending to be a velociraptor. Parenting (or, in my case, uncle-ing) seems to have a way of unearthing our own layers, doesn't it?