Building Momentum: The Power of Process
What if committing to a process could not only open doors you never knew existed but also transform who you are along the way?
In my weekly men’s group we’ve been doubling down on personal practices that truly make a difference in our lives. The group itself is a process we’ve all committed to—showing up each week, cultivating depth in our self-examination, and supporting one another in our journeys to show up at our best. We each focus on unique practices that cultivate excellence: for me, it’s committing to daily structure and key routines; for another guy, it’s starting a fitness program for the first time; for someone else, it’s waking up early to exercise for more energy; and for another, it’s getting up early to make a nutritious breakfast—and even serving his partner breakfast.
These aren’t just tasks—they’re commitments. Men who care and are willing to show up.
In our group, we’ve created a space of support, accountability, and celebration—a place where we honor our weekly wins and keep moving forward. Today, during one of those celebrations, a member and former 1:1 client of mine shared something profound about what’s possible when we commit to the process.
The Power of One Commitment
Just over two years ago, during a Zoom call, I asked him: “What would you love to create?”
He stumbled a bit, unsure what to say. Then, almost out of nowhere, he blurted out: “Learn Portuguese.”
I remember asking him why that mattered, and while he couldn’t fully articulate it, something deep inside him knew it was important. So, he committed to 30 minutes a night of learning Portuguese. Week by week, he built momentum.
The first six months were rough—he remembered thinking that he was literally not making progress, running in quicksand. But he showed up anyway. And eventually, he said it was like a “house of cards” fell, in a good kind of way. Learning became enjoyable. What began as 30 minutes a night evolved into watching Portuguese movies, setting up conversations with native speakers, and even working with tutors.
He wasn’t obsessing over different outcomes, like when he’d be fluent, he was focused on what he could control. Showing up and how he showed up.
The Results—and the Real Win
Today, he’s conversational in Portuguese—an epic accomplishment in itself. Even better, he’s preparing to give a best man speech in Brazil, in Portuguese. So awesome!
But the real win isn’t just the results. It’s what he taught himself about who he is:
He’s a man who commits and follows through.
He does what he loves.
He’s resilient.
He creates what he speaks.
As he shared his journey with the group, we were nodding and leaning forward in our seats with him. He recalled childhood memories of playing soccer with Brazilian friends and how meaningful it is now to communicate with one of his best friend’s moms, who barely speaks English. In that moment his why was so clear and heartfelt.
The Lesson: Love the Process
Do something you’d LOVE to do, and let the process guide everything. Just show up.
"You don’t have to see the whole staircase, just take the first step."
— Martin Luther King Jr.
Then take the next step, and the next.
It’s easy to get hung up on results or how long something might take. But in doing so, we miss the most important piece: who we become in the process of creating something we love.
Pro-Tip: Keep it simple and start small. Create a floor and a ceiling. I started meditating about eight years ago, it was off and on again for a couple years. Until I committed to just two minutes a day. That’s it. Over time, I built it up. I tracked my progress and celebrated the commitment along the way. Eventually, I established a floor (minimum dose) and a ceiling (ideal). My floor was always 2 minutes—no matter what—and my ceiling became 30–60-minute sits.
My ceiling is the norm these days. It’s no longer a habit, stillness is a way of being, and my meditation practice supports this.
We’re all searching over and beyond for motivation! Want motivation? Start doing the thing and keep doing it. It’s okay to not have a clear why. I often find myself overanalyzing, getting lost in trying to do the 'right' thing. But can I slow down and inquire: What if I trust my intuition? What if I listen to this whisper and let life unfold? One step, one day at a time—living fully in the discovery of my life. Go find out!
And here’s the real game-changer: who gives a flying F@&^ if you miss a day? Put that nonsense down. Just love that, forgive yourself, and recommit. That’s the process.
Creating in the collective, it’s so good … the shared energy amplifies each of our potential and momentum, inspiring deeper commitment and personal growth. Our shared space inspired me to write this.
If you made it here with me, thanks I love you… and, what are you committing to?
Who might you become along the way?
Live well.
Awesome. Love stories like this. I set a daily fitness goal for myself last year around this time. Will be writing about it later this year. I’ve been pleasantly surprised by the mental benefits of showing up every single day. That said, I’m with you on not letting a missed day get you down. I’d rather do 718/730 days than 365 in a row and take 3 months off.
Also, love this guy had a deeper why connected to a person. Sometimes climbing the mountain is enough, the journey and view from the top is worth the slips and falls. But I’ve always believed if you can find a higher purpose (ie Susan G Komen 3-Day), it provides some extra juice for the tough days.